Next week is Carer’s Week
Time to think about those who look after a loved-one full-time.
I am a full-time Carer.
I gave up my career when Rainer was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder in 2006.
I finished the Semester in June 2006 and haven’t worked a day in a classroom since.
I threw out all my Units of Work, my planners; my textbooks (which amount to hundreds of dollars) are in boxes – I just can’t give those away…too precious.
The lesson I’ve learned???
LIFE IS FLUID
What you expect your life to become sometimes is not under your control.
You WILL sacrifice your dreams for the benefit of others.
You goals will change, almost weekly.
You will grieve, anger, take self-pity, gather to action, force awareness and change, piss a lot of people off in the process, lose “friends”, learn to NOT RELY ON ANYONE to help you get where you need to go.
You need to drive it, others can simply fill the tank of wellness and support to keep you moving….
YOU DRIVE THIS VEHICLE OF CARE.
Ironic that in Queensland, Monday is a pupil-free day, just to remind us Carers of these things … LOL.
“But what can I do??” I hear you ask.
Be a good friend.
Grieve with her/him.
Break into their house (just kidding) and steal one week’s worth of washing.
Send a frozen dinner every so often.
If you ASK them how you can help, they’ll say, “Oh, nothing. Everything’s alright.” because that’s what I say, and I say it because I’m so overwhelmed some days, I go into ‘COPING MODE’ and can’t think beyond the next phone call and argument/discussion I need to have to fight for my child.
Go armed with this question….
WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE TODAY?
Give her a minute or two…and she’ll tell you.