That’s how I feel right now
unable to think straight
order things in my life
be the mother/wife/friend I want to be
I feel this great surge of helplessness and I feel mute and paralysed.
What an awful feeling….
I have no idea where to begin –
who can help me (not in a “let’s have a chat…” way – done heaps of that already)
who can help Rainer (there’s the rub!!)
and who can help me to help Rainer.
Do I stay on course?
Alter the current course?
Or jump ship altogether?
I’ve dug myself this great big, dirty SHITHOLE and I don’t know what the answer is to stop it from stinking to high Heaven.
I have lost faith in a lot of people (no need to go into details here) who I trusted to help me answer these questions in the past……
and now I feel lost……..
BUT knowing who I am
things will become clearer (which may involve me swallowing my pride a little – really hate that…admitting I “may” have been incorrect or been given information that may not be quite truthful – grrrrrr)
the shithole will compost nicely and fertilise the seed of doubt in my head
and a beautiful garden full of possibilities will emerge….
4 thoughts on “!! paralysed !!”
Hi Gigi,Not sure what’s happening, but I really do wish you all the best. You sound very sad, and I hope someone can help you.Take careSheree
I really wished I could Gigi but I really have no idea how to help you to help Rainer.Please let me know if there is anything I can do.P.S. Thanks for the RAK. I love it all.
Hey Gigi,I’m worried about you…:(If you EVER need a chat…email me please. I am always here to listen if you need someone.Thinking of you.MWAH…xxxBelindaxxx
Hey Gigi,I dont know how to help but I am always thinking of you. You can always ring me if you need to vent.Tanya xxxooo